Wednesday, January 2, 2013


I want to live without consequences
I want to live without questions
I want to live without judgement

What would happen if I exposed the darkest parts of me for all to see
How would they come back to haunt me
Would I care
Would it matter
Would it change the course of my life
Would it put me in danger
Would it attract the wrong people

Fuck we live in such a weird weird world
I never feel like I fit
I never feel like any of this matters to me
People are so intriguing
Shouldn't we want to see their shadows
Doesn't it make it more interesting

I am sick of this cookie cutter world
I crave diversity
I crave abnormal
Bring me the freaks dammit

It's a shame I feel like I have to start an anonymous blog just to be able to write about everything on my mind. What world have we created? Why are these walls necessary? Why can I be more open here than I can be face to face with some of my friends. Such a strange thing. Why am I participating, why do I feel like I have to?

And I guess the other thing is this blog being connected to me professionally. GD.
Worlds colliding. All the different women I've been. All the different poses I've taken. Hold tight.
I wish I could share. My muscles spasm with indifference.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Monday, April 2, 2012

Taken by Kris Rodammer

Don't call it a comeback

                                                         Uploaded by  

I've been practicing flexibility
 like owning my own breathing
 taking in moments like a gymnast
inhaling life and living it
not just
as a witness
movement without thought

walking on your pores 
and swimming in your blood
you embodied my veins
 like sunshine 
memories of sunsets at a distance 
making love like maniacs

you make the hairs on my arm stand up 
like a cat 
i could never forget 
you were the only one
marking my body
 like highlighter 
on a map

But somehow it turned
you were suddenly
discovering america in my vagina 
marking the clitoris like Columbus
trying to own 
all that
which came before you ...

clapping is to orgasms
 like thanksgiving
for my womanhood

you forget my whole life
is a gift

I've been sailing this ship
for awhile now
playing hide and go seek with the moon
navigating this path like
stars in Orion's belt
flowing deep into the oblivion

trusting nothing
 but my own

Sunday, May 15, 2011

I moved.

In so many ways.

...   ....

I count blessings like I count stars
laying in the bed of a truck on
a coke-ridden night
celebrating the day of the dead
and a new-found friends birth

I walk up steps to a tower
that plays neighbors
with a road filled with
wild cats
and i hold hands with the fog
as I step barefoot
into the land of the forbidden

refilled with those moments on a rooftop in New York
- I look past maps of ancient centuries
and I remember you

As I hug you in a restaurant while listening to easy rock
and I  meet you in TimeSquare as a comedian named Jeffrey
and  I fuck you like a lover of the past

I remember you.
And I love you.


Sunday, May 8, 2011